If I Was To Die In The Morning
by False Shepard
Summary: AU: Love is a promise whispering goodbye. Waiting for you to hold me tight, I need one more wish before Wonderland fades... and if I was to die in the morning... would I still be sleeping with you? Song-centric, LightxFang
1. any words to fill in the blanks

**if I was to die in the morning...**

_Love is a refuge with fears and doubts. Waiting for you to hold me tight, I need one more wish before Wonderland fades..._  
_and if I was to die in the morning... would I still be sleeping with you?_

_

* * *

_

_A perfect leader._

She wasn't one.

Lightning Farron watched the group from distance. By no means was she on Sentinel duty, the night as still young and the ragtag group of L'Cie was still up and active around the fire. The older ones were much more animated than the younger ones; it was to be expected however. With her naked fingers just brushing the dark handle of her Blazefire Saber. Sazh was busy fitting the last catalyst to her Erkindler Gunblade. He was confident that it would bring the weapon up into its final state.

She didn't really care, Erkindler or Omega, it was still a weapon.

She wouldn't let him touch her Blazefire anyway.

_~Dressed with invisible pearls and lighted colors~  
~She's a broken flower, in a huge wounded body~_

Someone might have called her name, or not, she didn't really hear them as she leapt off the small drop point near the small campground the group had chosen for the night. When she wanted to be alone she'd walk off and everyone would respect her wishes. A perfect leader wouldn't abandon the group for petty personal needs like this.

_Wait._

She quickly turned on heel and bounded up the rocks and back to camp. Cutting across the grass, passing the two Plusians and Hope who was playing Sazh's harmonica in a soothing jazz tune; Sazh jumped slightly when his Ommi Kit sparked, disliking the new shape Lightning's Erkindler was transforming into. Already, the pilot had a handful of weapons baring new appearances at his feet; he was putting the Trapezohedrons they had found today into good use.

It took Snow a moment to realize Lightning was standing in front of him, arms crossed with a death glare. He stammered a series of incoherent words as Light held out her hand.

"Uhh... Sis?"

"Serah." Lightning commanded, it completely dumbfounded the giant oaf. He stared back for a second too long for Lightning's liking before his eyes went wide in realization. He scrambled around in his pockets and pulled out the large blue teardrop crystal, tossing it to her. She snapped it out of the air and hardly regarded him with a nod before turning around, the fabric of her slim red cape snapping slightly at the movements. Snow watched the area of darkness she had disappeared off into.

An hour later Fang got up and followed Lightning's tracks while Vanille took a hop, step and a leap over to Hope.

_~Traveling for years to find some place to stay~  
~She loses herself in someone else's, someone else's tragedy~_

Lightning wished that the Steppe wasn't as flat and barren as it was. Holding Serah's crystal tight against her necklace, she jumped down a couple more levels before coming to a rest. If everything had played out differently, no one would have gotten caught up in this mess. If everything was _right_ she would still be at home in Cocoon.

However, she would have never learnt the truth; she still would have remained a dog of the military.

_A pet._

Shaking her head, she stood up, and kept walking, holding the crystal just right so it captured the setting sun just perfectly. This felt stupid, but that one time before, when Snow was around, it almost felt right. Muttering Serah's name the sunlight refracted differently for a mere second. Lightning stopped her walk for a second was Serah truly aware of the feats this group was performing?

The crystal shimmered again, almost like a response; Lightning swiftly dropped her hand down and hung her head. Somehow, this one silent conversation was flooding her mind of unwanted memories and emotions she didn't want. She could feel the solitary tear fall, this wasn't her family's problem in the first place, and now they're all caught up in it. Why was she crying?

_~Spinning round like a gypsy fallen queen~  
~Schizophrenic, shining secretly for the man who gently say~  
~How wonderful she used to be~_

Lightning stopped walking when her feet splashed into a clear shallow pond in the Steppe. Making a soft noise in surprise, something she usually only made when a Chocobo had found something.

_Chocobo..._

"Serah, you've never seen a Gran Pulse Chocobo have you?" Lightning asked softly, her voice almost mute a she held the blue crystal, capturing the appearance of the yellow bird lounging beside the waterfront near a small cliff. Deciding to be a little daring for once she slowly walked out of the water and edged her way around. The Chocobo slowly raised his head, acknowledging Lightning's presence, shifting his body like he was inviting her in. Slowly and hesitantly, something she wasn't familiar with doing, she held her free hand out and placed it on the Chocobo's head, he make a sound of content and moved around in her hand. A small smile pinched at the corners of Lightning's lips as she knelt down beside it. She never got that chance to do this with Serah, if that vacation she had planned wasn't blotched by the whole Fal'Cie fiasco they would be in Nautilus right now.

The Chocobo wasn't content with just the petting, or somehow, he was able to read Light's emotions just as well as another person Lightning just wanted out of her head right now. Moving his head, he tugged on Light's glove, slipping it off by mistake, making a sound of disappointment; he raised his head and nibbled at right shoulder of her sleeveless jacket.

"Oh..."

Feeling awkward and disregarding the fact she had never done this with another human; family didn't count. She moved her body and leaned against the side the Chocobo was offering her, the warmth he gave off reminded her of her forgotten bed at home. The Chocobo made a satisfied sound before moving his head and nipping at her slim cape, throwing it over his neck before resting his head on her lap. A little lost with the affection the creature was giving her, Lightning buried her bare hand into the yellow feathers. Already she was feeling more relaxed since that time of the fireworks.

_That felt like eons ago..._

Holding out the blue crystal again, she closed her eyes, enjoying the weight of the Chocobo on her lap, it reminded her of when they were younger, on how Serah would often fall asleep on her lap.

_~Tell me little sister, is it warm and safe in there~  
~your face is like winter and your eyes seem so dry~_

Lightning didn't know it, but tears were escaping her again, was she crying for herself, for Serah or for the both of them? Her mind spun, she didn't want memories, not now.

_~Any words to fill the blanks, speak out little sister~  
~Are you waiting for me somewhere deep inside~_

"_Oh no, unfortunately we're on vacation. It would be too far to take it all the way to Palumpolum."_

_The word 'vacation' echoed in Lightning's mind as she watched a mother and her son converse with a shopkeeper. Mindlessly she allowed her feet to whisk her away to mindlessly travel the shopping mall as her mind pondered off. A vacation, it would be the perfect way to make everything up to Serah, to apologize for making her little sister so lonely._

_Sure, they wouldn't be able to leave for long, but if she went a booked a handful of her days off together they would at least be able to leave the sea-side city for a period of time. There she could be completely open to Serah, listen to anything she wanted to talk about, learn everything and fill in the blanks about her sister's life she's been missing out on._

_Her birthday, she could tell Serah. As a thank you for all the thought she had put into it and for everything else, a thank you for always waiting for her. A minor smile, she had to thank that mother and her son._

At the time, she didn't know it was Hope and Nora. She couldn't have even guess that half the blanks would have been filled in on her worst birthday.

_~Standing on the corner she's trying sometimes~  
~ to touch my world to reach my side of the wire~  
~Walking the whole universe to cross the line~_

The Chocobo nudged her back to reality. Slightly disoriented but happy to be rid of that particular, life changing, memory, she scratched the large bird's neck. He chirped in content before moving his head brushing up against her neck, returning the gesture. Lightning knew if Snow, or Etro forbid, Fang, saw her now, she would never live it down. Holding up the teardrop crystal again, she knew that even the Chocobo was looking at it. Serah knew that such a side of her older sister existed a long time ago and would be overjoyed to see her now.

"Serah, can you forgive me?"

_If you can forgive yourself first._

With one last stroke of affection towards the Chocobo she stood up. He chirped in disapproval, but Lightning just shook her head gently before walking closer to the water's edge. While she enjoyed the warmth, she was starting to remember and think of things that could have been, she didn't want that, it wasn't the reason why she had wandered away so far from the camp. She sat down on a patch of grass, noting how the Chocobo stubbornly moved to sit beside her, holding her discarded glove in his beak.

"Serah, he's just as persistent as you." Lightning mused to herself as she took her glove back, she didn't put it on; she just slipped it into her bag.

_~Spinning round like the gypsy fallen queen~  
~Schizophrenic, shining secretly, for the man who gently say~  
~How wonderful she used to be~_

Conversations of silence, that's what Snow did. For what reason was there to have a one-sided conversation with a crystal and a Chocobo that probably didn't understand half the things that were said?

The Chocobo was nudging her again, she made a minor sound of irritation but he ignored her. She couldn't tell the creature to go away; after all, she was the one who had stumbled on him.

She wasn't inclined to move however.

The bird stood up and squawked at her and, without warning, pushed Lightning over. Instantly her hand shot for her Blazefire, but the bird was faster than the disorientated and confused solider, in a quick flash of feathers her gunblade was knocked out of her hand and into the water. She grumbled, getting the mud out of the mechanics will not be fun.

"What was that... for?" Light's raged died instantly when the Chocobo stared at her, so maybe she needed to give the breed of animals more credit than she had initially, heck, even Sazh's Baby Chocobo was rather smart too.

_~Tell me little sister, is it warm and safe in there~_

"Okay, I'll admit it, I'm upset and I don't know how to deal with it." Lightning finally told the bird. He chirped and padded the ground slightly before bowing his head to nudge Light's only gloved hand that was holding onto Serah's Crystal. She opened her hand and held it out between them, she felt foolish. But at least the Chocobo wouldn't tell the world that Lightning Farron had finally broken down.

She hadn't felt this distressed since the time the doctors had filled her in on her mother's condition. Being the oldest and with no relatives, they had no choice.

"_You don't have to do it all yourself."_

Of course she didn't, she had Serah, but she wanted to. She wanted to be an adult; she wanted to be Serah's guardian even if she had to give up her last connection to her parents. Her bare hand buried itself into the Chocobo's feathers again. She had made that vow on her mother's grave, discarded her given name and became _'Lightning'._

Serah, didn't say anything, she only smiled, even then, Lightning knew what she was trying to tell her under that expression.

_~Your face is like winter and your eyes seem so dry~_

She bowed her head, finally allowing her tears to roll relentlessly down her cheeks; she just couldn't hold them back anymore. The Chocobo moved and nudged her shoulder before grasping her cape in his beak again, trying to lead her over to the rocky outcrop not too far away from where they stood. Her movement was sluggish, he knew that Lightning was lost in her thoughts or memories again; the glazed look in her grey-blue eyes was more than enough to tell the bird.

_~Any words to fill the blanks, speak out little sister~  
~Are you waiting for me somewhere deep inside~_

"Serah." She murmured again, the grip around the odd crystal becoming tighter as her hand moved up to unusual lightning bolt necklace around her neck. The Chocobo gave one sharp downward tug on the crimson cape, the force and the sound of snapping stitches was enough to wake the ex-soldier out of her stupor and stare at the bird again. He squawked at her again and sat down on the longer grass exposing the side of his body like he had earlier. Lightning shook her head and moved to walk away, but a sharp sound from his beak stopped her.

"Why are you doing all of this?"

He ruffled his feathers proudly before fixing a stare.

"I can't stay, I have to get back to my..."

Could she really call them her friends?

"_Cute little spoiled girl. We used to call you that before Serah was born."_

Lightning swiftly shook her head; memories were attacking her like a torrential rain. Sighing she walked towards the Chocobo and sat down against him, the bird repeating the same movements before moving her cape before resting his head on her lap. He nudged her gloved hand and she opened it to reveal the crystal again. Was Serah really seeing all of this or was this just some delusion Snow had come up with and she unwillingly believed him? She just closed her eyes and let a soft hum escape her lips, one last memory.

_~Carousel has slowly stopped spinning around~_

"_Serah!" Lightning roared as she stood in the middle of the messy family room. While she didn't need it on her day off, she had upturned and cleaned every room in the house during her frantic search for her missing Blazefire Saber. It had disappeared from its rightful place in its holster a few days ago. Serah dropped off the face of Cocoon and Lightning's hours worked just perfectly so that they wouldn't see each other or give her the time to properly ravage the house._

_Going to work gunless for those few days left her open to Sergeant Major Amoda's jokes and his uncanny ability to lead her on in circles. However, that spark in his eye, told her that he was behind the unusual hours or her missing Blazefire._

"_Claire?" Serah asked as she poked into the family room, the glare Lightning sent her way had more than one meaning. The older Farron was frustrated over her missing gunblade and it _just_ didn't help that today was her twentieth birthday and the day of the annual fireworks. "What's wrong Light?"_

"_I'm on to you." Lightning snapped. "You're behind Blazefire's disappearance."_

"_Blazefire?" Serah asked, confused, she wasn't aware that Lightning had named her military issued weapon. Maybe it was just the model name, but Lightning would never call something by a precise name unless it was habit or important to her._

_Maybe she really did mess up._

"_My gunblade." Lightning growled as she started to set the room straight after her, not so smooth, search. "It's not where I put it last and you're the only other person who lives here!"_

"_Wait! Light! Okay! I'm sorry!" Serah held her hands up in defence. "I took it."_

"_Why? You know I need it." Lightning asked her, crossing her arms, Serah swayed side to side for a second, holding her hands behind her back. She didn't answer and Light kept the pressing silence. Sighing in defeat, Serah held up a finger, telling her to wait. She disappeared upstairs and returned with a wrapped box. Lightning had already cleaned the room and was sitting on the couch, arms still crossed and the TV remote sitting on her lap._

"_I was going to wait until after dinner, but if it will calm you down now..." Serah muttered as she sat down beside Lightning, placing the wrapped box on the coffee table. Lightning looked at it with a wary eye; the box was a very familiar size._

"_I didn't know what to get you, so I figured, just maybe..." Serah started, but stopped. Lightning spared her a glace before leaning forward, untying the ribbon and removing the lid. Her Blazefire Saber sat in the box in its gun form. With a first glance Lightning could tell it had been polished, but what spiked her curiosity was the engraving on the silver metal just above the handle._

_It was faint, but it was there, skilfully done in Cocoon's Calligraphy was her chosen name._

"_Serah..." Lightning started as she held it up in her hands, it was only done on the right side of the weapon._

"_Flip it out, like how you usually do." Serah added with a soft smile, enjoying the look of amazement and wonder on her older sister's face, she rarely got to see it anymore. Lightning didn't nod or say anything as the gunblade opened up and folded upon itself as the blade pivoted on the arm that now had Light's chosen name on it. "I just..."_

_Lightning ran her fingers over the blade, reading the small sentence on the metal._

"_White flash. Call upon my name."_

"_Light?" Serah asked, her response was a small smile and an even rarer hug. The little sister had no hesitation in returning the affection, she had nailed it perfectly. Serah didn't think she could beat the necklace she had given her last year._

_~Alice won't be back this time, Wonderland's fading~  
~as she closes the lights and drops the bottle down~_

"Serah." Escaped Lightning's lips one last time as her head rolled to the side, sleep was granting her body with open arms. Even the usual demons decided to give the broken Lightning a chance. Her hand slowly slipped off the dormant Chocobo's head and the crystal that was sandwiched between them tumbled down and into the grass.

_~Wonderland's fading, Wonderland's fading~_

Fang stopped on the other side of the water, it wasn't hard to miss Lightning, dare she say, snuggled up against a Chocobo. Placing her hands on her hips she shifted her weight back and forth a few times, she had a few options. She could turn a blind eye to this and return to camp, humiliate Lightning for her own pleasure, or attempt something that just might get her killed.

_~Tell me little sister is it warm and safe in there~  
~your face is like winter and your eyes seem so dry~_

She noted Light's Blazefire Saber in the water, something like that was highly unusual to see. The woman never let the weapon out of her sight and after she had picked up the Axis Blade in Palumpolum she tucked Blazefire away like she had a fear of the weapon being ruined. So when Sazh demanded that Lightning was to hand over her Erkindler so he could work on it, she handed it over with a fuss. Right afterwards she walked over to one of floating devices that Sazh frequently used to shop for upgrade components and withdrew her Blazefire Saber from the storage function.

Hope had told her what it was, but Fang had swiftly forgotten, it was just another thing on her weird Cocoon technology list. Stabbing her Kain's Lance into the ground she walked into the water to fish out Lightning's Blazefire. She didn't know how long it had been under the water, but certainly it was long enough that Light would be spending a few good hours cleaning it. Half-heartily tossing it over to her own weapon she studied Lightning's dormant appearance. It was the only time anyone got to see a look of pure innocence on their stern leader's face.

_~Tell me little sister is it warm and safe in there~  
~your face is like winter and your eyes seem so dry~_

She walked closer to the two and placed her hands on her hips; the Chocobo woke up and fixed a threatening glare at Fang. The older woman huffed, just who in the world did the bird thinks he is?

Judging from the tear stains on Lightning's face, the Chocobo was certainly enough to wreak the brick wall Lightning had built up around her, something she had been trying to do since she had met the soldier. The damned bird was a wrecking ball while everyone else was hacking away brick by brick. The Chocobo then looked away, like he was telling her to take Lightning and leave, but just watch her back for the rest of her time here.

"Hey, hey! It's nothing like that!" Fang told the bird, her accent making her sound more playful that she had initially wanted, the bird didn't believe her as he settled his head on the ground, still glaring. "Oh how do I put this?" she crossed her arms and took a slight step back so her body turned slightly

_~Any words~_

She looked back at the Chocobo, his eyes still trained on her, huffing she rolled her eyes and a shrill chirp came from him. Fang looked back, noticing that he was struggling with something in the grass. Walking over he snapped a '_don't you dare'_ look at her, but she ignored him.

"She's my friend too yeh know?" Fang told the Chocobo as she kneeled down on a single knee, pulling the blue teardrop crystal off the ground. "Well I'll be, Sunshine does miss her little sister." Fang whispered as she held up Serah's crystal, everyone knew that Lightning would wake at the sound – no, that wouldn't be right – she would more or less wake up at the sound of a sharp, loud laugh rather than a pin drop.

"I hope I can meet you properly one day, Serah." Fang said with a smile. With the way both Lightning and Snow, especially Snow, talked about her, Fang knew that just seeing the girl unconscious in the Pulse Vestige wasn't enough. Heck, even Vanille got a chance to speak with her.

"I hope so too."

_~Any words to fill the blanks, speak out little sister~_

"How long have you been up?" Fang asked smugly as she rested her arms over her knee. Lightning's eyes cracked open slightly as the Oerbian woman saw a faint smile grace the soldier's lips.

"You're... not all that quiet in the water." Lightning responded, Fang swore mentally, so she was up for all of it. Light's gloved hand moved and rested on the ground beside her, simply guessing, Fang took it as an invitation to sit beside her. Fang decided to try to keep a distance however, knowing Lightning's defensive nature over her personal bubble that the Chocobo had clearly destroyed earlier, but she wasn't going to try. "Whatever you prefer then."

So Lightning did want her closer, the Chocobo really did make her snap. She hesitantly moved closer so she was just brushing against Lightning and leaning against the yellow bird as well, she didn't dare to push for more. To her surprise, Lightning chuckled.

"What?" Fang nearly snapped, Light titled her head back to rest against the Chocobo, the soft light reflected from Cocoon gave her appearance an earthly glow, for such a battle harden warrior of Cocoon, anyone would say it, she was beautiful.

_~Are you waiting for me somewhere deep inside~_

"All of this..." Light started, another unusual thing, she hardly started anything but a fight. "Everything seems like Alice's Wonderland." She said, Fang assumed she was talking about Gran Pulse and the whole L'Cie business, it was serious business anyway, but she returned Lightning's previous chuckle.

"I don't think I'm familiar with that story." Fang commented, just looking at the other warrior, she had her eyes closed now. "But yeah, it just seems like one big dream." She hesitantly wrapped her arm around Lightning's shoulders, to her surprise, she leaned in closer.

"It's fading..." Lightning whispered, Fang couldn't help but be a little smug, no one else has seen their leader like this, soft, gentle, a fragile being that was ready to shatter at a moment's notice. She wouldn't be like this tomorrow; she'd be wound up so tightly and act like nothing happened.

But she'll still be ready to break.

"The dream or the memory?" Fang asked softly, Lightning didn't respond. The dark haired woman remained motionless, feeling Light's body loosen up as she fell back asleep. Opening her hand to expose Serah's Crystal, for once, she didn't know what to say or think. There had to be a reason why Lightning had remained in such a vulnerable state long after she had found her. If it was anyone else, she probably would have buried herself back in her soldier shell. Closing her own eyes, she let sleep overtake her.

_~Are you waiting~_

Lightning was the first to wake that morning. Panic consumed her first, not used to waking to such warmth. She had fallen sideways overnight and was partly on top of Fang. Her semi-dormant brain froze, memories of her persona last night and then Fang, no; Fang was acting in a similar way too. A smile didn't reach her stoic expression, but her eyes shimmered slightly. Even the Chocobo had moved overnight so his head was resting near Fang's head and not Lightning's feet.

Nothing was coming together to explain what emotion she was feeling right now. Part of her wanted to stay and study Fang's features, another part of her wanted to run away. She stayed, closing her eyes again, not sleeping but clearly relaxed. Even with Fang's arm secured tightly around her waist, nothing felt out of place.

Anything that Fang would throw at her later on, she'll just deal with it.

* * *

**A/N:** This originally started as a little muse in the back of my head and I couldn't get it out. This is initially planned to be a one-shot, but I've _pretty much_ dismantled a handful of other songs, so I might make this into a 5-chapter Light/Fang-centric short story.

Depending on the response, the second chapter will probably be the hardest to do.

Heck... I've really never done something like this before.

**Chapter Song:** Little Sister  
**Artist:** Your Favorite Enemies (The band behind Cosmos, Chaos and THE MESSENGER from Dissida: Final Fantasy)

**Disclaimer:** Everything used belongs to their rightful owners; I'm not in the mood to draw up my usual fancy disclaimers.


	2. I'm standing there, right next to you

**if I was to die in the morning...**

_Love is a promise whispering goodbye. Waiting for you to hold me tight, I need one more wish before Wonderland fades...  
and if I was to die in the morning... would I still be sleeping with you?

* * *

_

_**Fire:**__ I was amazed at the response I got, I know people tend dislike songfics, but we all know it's because of the way they tend to be written. I'm planning to stick with the Lighting/Fang consistency throughout the story, after all, that's what the story is titled for.

* * *

_

Being restless wasn't an uncommon state for the group. Even the air of depression that hung above them was something one would have to get used to quickly. If it wasn't Lightning creating that tension, it was Hope, and if it wasn't Hope is was Snow and sometimes, just sometimes, it would be Sazh.

Fang slowly sat up on the couch she had chosen for the night. Her mind had been caught in the rut since they had laid eyes on the ruins of Oerba from the top of Taejin's Tower. The crystal dust that had covered everything for as far as the eye could see. She quickly guessed that if the village was inhabited, no one would be there to welcome either her or Vanille with open arms.

Seeing Bhakti and old photos told the warrior that her entire family had disappeared during the War of Transgression. The endless Cie'th, it had to be them. She wasn't one for regrets, but seeing the state of their home village was like one big empty broken promise.

_~It's four AM and I, and I can't sleep~  
~the room is cold, it's hard to breathe~_

She tapped her feet against the wood flooring while her head rested in her hands. Vanille was probably with Hope right now, the two practically became inseparable after they had disappeared for a moment in the Tsubaddran Highlands. It was safe to assume, aside from whoever was on Sentinel duty, that everyone was asleep.

Grabbing her lance that was resting by the doorway she walked outside, a warm, familiar, gust of salty air greeting her. Travelling down the stairs, she stopped to place her hands on her hips and look down at her exposed toes.

_Just what the hell..._

This wasn't like her, what happened to the front that she usually put on in front of everyone? Has seeing her home in ruins like this put her in the same state of mind Lightning was in just days earlier?

_~I've lost my mind only, only to find~  
~there is nobody for me to speak~_

She kicked at the ground slightly, crystal dust fluttering up before falling again, slowly looking up at the darkness that surrounded Oerba. It was much darker than she remembered, however, with no one living here; there was no reason for light anyway.

_Light..._

It was easy to pick out in the darkness, the two glowing yellow bands from Lightning's shoulder armour. It was always a wonder how it always managed to stay lit, heck even PISCOM's armour was like that too. It was probably just another thing to add to her ever growing 'Weird Cocoon Technology' list, heck even Light's gunblade and Sazh's weird transforming guns were, well, bizarre.

The glowing bands disappeared behind a building and Fang started to walk, she knew her old favourite spot, the dock, was still roughly intact. Even though the ocean no longer shimmered the way it once did, the sound of crashing waves never changed. It was just something the warrior found soothing; she made a point to visit the beach during her short stay at Bodhum. The fireworks were beautiful that night.

She grumbled when she sat down on the rusted steel of the dock, pulling off her shoes before dipping her feet in the water. There was so much she wanted to say but there was no one to talk to. Okay maybe not, Sazh would listen to anything and give his 'old man's insight' with that flippant tone of his. Vanille loved it, Fang, not so much. Resting her head against her hands she groaned, she was completely lost.

She froze when she felt something press up against her back; she could feel the warmth from the leather, but a sharp coolness from a set of metal buckles.

_~I'm standing there, right next to you~_

"This isn't like you." She heard Lightning's deep voice speak in almost a consistent monotone. Fang was surprised that chuckle didn't leave her lips.

"I can say the same thing about the Chocobo." She sung back, the tone was in her voice, but not the usual sarcasm. She didn't bend her head back to look up at Lightning, so she missed the flash of a smirk on the ex-soldier's face. "We all... can have our moments." She whispered, her eyes trained on the horizon. Lightning stepped away from her before bending down to unbuckle her boots and removing them.

"Do you... want to talk about it?" Lightning offered as she sat down beside Fang, her left arm brushing against Fang's right.

_~Your body's warm, but I don't care~_

"Preferably not." Fang answered back, Light didn't say anything or make a sound. Another breeze blew by, picking up the hem of Light's cape and softly dancing it across Fang's exposed back. There was a simple hum that echoed between them. Light seemed content with the silence, something that rarely happened when it was just the two of them.

"You really are... a lot like me." Lightning spoke after an extended period of silence, Fang shot her a glare.

"Excuse me?"

Lightning made a satisfied sound before leaning back. If Fang titled her head just right, she could see Light's silver navel piercing reflecting the moonlight. She narrowed her eyes, ever since that damned Chocobo, the Farron always acted slightly different around her when it was just the two of them.

_Lightning's no longer ready to break._

Then... what about herself?

_~I'm on my own for way too long~  
~There's no time left for confusion~_

"We are not the same." Fang snapped, Lightning hummed, not believing her and only serving to irritate the lancer further. It was like the roles were reversed, maybe that Juggernaut hit both of them harder in the head than Hope had originally suspected.

"You're breaking down."

"I'm not."

"You're ready to."

_~My heart is broken, and love is bent~_

Fang didn't answer, she simply grabbed onto the red fabric that was fluttering by the left side of her waist and gave it a harsh tug. Lightning was jerked left, crashing into Fang's shoulder before her back slammed against the dock. Lightning didn't make a sound as Fang quickly jumped up onto her feet, splashing water. Rage was apparent now.

"Just who the bloody hell do you think you are?!" Fang shouted at Farron, her hands balling into fists. Lightning tried to sit up, but with Fang's foot on her cape, she couldn't, instead she brought her hands over her shoulders and behind her head. Fang was expecting a smug look from Lightning, the more she thought about it, she was getting the same treatment she gave her back in Palumpolum. Instead she heard snaps being released as Lightning finally stood up, her cape and the leather band that held it to her jacket was now lying on the dock.

"I've been a couple different people. I think I know who I am." Lightning answered, crossing her arms and looking away. Slowly clenching and unclenching her hands, Fang gave the dock a death glare, she just couldn't respond to the attitude Lightning was giving her. A huff escaped the light-haired soldier's lips as her bare feet padded the ground slightly. "I can tell when a comrade is lost."

_~I've reached the end, everything's gone~  
~There's no time left for confusion~_

Lightning started to pace around her, her arms still crossed. Fang just stared forward trying to avoid any eye contact the sergeant was giving her. "They put up a front, act tough, but once they're alone, they start to crack." She started, Fang fought hard not to stare. "They find themselves confused, unable to understand their emotions, like there is nothing left for them."

"Farron..." Fang muttered, the woman was reading her; the steady look Lightning gave her was piercing, like she was listening to something that Fang didn't dare to say.

_~My heart is broken~_

_Fang found herself on edge when she and Vanille returned to the temple. The small door they had used was pushed open just a shade wider and the elevator had signs that it had been used. There was an intruder, and no doubting it, it was someone from Cocoon. Fang whispered that to Vanille as she pulled her Bladed Lance off her back. Vanille slowly walked in deeply, her head titling upwards to look at the ceiling._

_The temple was originally built to serve as a test for those who wished to become L'Cie. The shrine was like a cloister of trials leading up to the deepest part where the fal'Cie Anima rested. However, those who wanted the power for personal gain or was just simply unfit would be unable to part the gates that sealed Anima away. At least, that's what the priests back home had said._

_Continuing up the path, they tried to be a silent as possible, Fang held her lance up so it wouldn't click against the marble staircase. Upon reaching the first door they saw that it was open, Vanille gasped lightly._

"_If it is someone from Cocoon, they shouldn't have been able to open the door!" Vanille squeaked. She looked around in a slight panic; clearly if it was someone from Cocoon they shouldn't have been able to open the door. "But this isn't..." she was lost, Fang shook her hand and rushed past, now everything was starting to become a problem. Up the stairs, to the elevator, down the hall, two more doors where open._

_Now was the time to panic, somehow Cocoon had found a way to trick the so-called Holy Gates._

"_This can't be happening..."_

_The last door swung open, both of them had only been here once before, the intruder was lying on the ground. The light pink haired girl was unarmed and roughly the same age as Vanille. Fang didn't want to state the obvious, the teen was alone, chances where, she just simply got lost and wondered too far. She looked at Vanille, clearly the debate was if they should kill the girl or not._

"_Wait!" Vanille shouted, waving her hands frantically when she spotted something. She knelt down and picked up the girl's arm. "She's been made into a... a L'Cie." Their minds raced, Fang quickly scooped the girl up in her arms, if anything meant anything; they needed to get her out of the Vestige. Swiftly leaving through the doors the girl in Fang's arms whispered a single word, still not living in the waking world._

"_Claire..."_

_~It's four AM and I'm fading~  
~Wish I was bold enough to scream~_

Fang grounded her teeth together. Sure, all she had done since she had met Lightning was provoke her, but she didn't think the soldier would dare to poke her back. She shot a glare at Light that was swiftly returned. It was easy to feel the tension; it felt like it needed to escalate to a full out screaming match. Fang would gladly do that, but Lightning was nowhere near bold enough to scream. Light slowly uncrossed her arms and just held them at her sides.

"You're confused, aren't you?" Light asked her, Fang snapped her head up, surprised. Most people would bare a knowing smirk on their face or a slight sparkle in their eye. Lightning had neither.

"Whats'it matter to you?" Fang shot back; Lightning shifted her weight around as if she was trying to think of something to say. Clearly she couldn't come up with anything and remained silent for a moment longer.

"Just how much have you walked away from?"

Fang didn't think; her hand in a fist, she lashed out and punched Lightning in the jaw, her head quickly snapped to the side as Fang quickly spun on the ball of her foot so her back was facing the soldier.

_~For all I've done and walked away~_

"Did that make you feel any better?" Lightning asked, rubbing her jaw, Fang huffed.

"No."

_~There's no much hope for me to pray~_

She didn't move; she didn't want to admit that Lightning was right. She was breaking down all of her pent up emotions and stress, the time she turned her back on the group in the Fifth Ark, the time she nearly lashed out at Vanille; it was all her failing to keep up her usual composure. Lightning was clearly better and hiding it than she was, but she had seen the mask crack as well. When she had hugged Hope in Palumpolum and that night with the Chocobo, it made her suspect that she had shown moments of weakness around Hope earlier on as well.

Hands returning to her hips, she hung her head slightly. Fang could hear the rustle of fabric behind her and two steps on the dock. After a fresh breeze Lightning's bare hand touched her left shoulder. Fang tensed; clearly this was Light returning the favour from a few nights earlier. When Lightning rested her head at the center of her back, the lancer relaxed as a musical hum filled the air. This time, Fang knew it was Lightning making the sound.

_~I'm standing there, right next to you~  
~Your body's warm, but I don't care~_

"_When asked, 'what kind of relationship do you have?' I say 'Maybe, a little more than just friends.'"_ Lightning whispered; her voice was carrying the same pattern her earlier hum had. _"But that's not quite right either..."_

Fang just closed her eyes, Lightning's voice died back into the hum again before disappearing; her warm touch was all that was left. The Farron was right; she had no choice but to admit it.

_~I'm on my own for way too long~  
~There's no time left for confusion~_

"You win Light." Fang sighed, shoulders dropping, Lightning's hand ghosted down her arm and wrapped around her waist. With the way she moved, Fang was able to tell that Light was experienced when it came to comforting someone, but she was rusty, like it had been years since she had to support someone emotionally. "Everything just feels like a bad dream and I just want to wake up from it all."

_~My heart is broken, and love is bent~_

"It will fade... mine did." Lightning whispered, Fang finally realized what she had meant the other night when she had muttered _"its fading"_ to her. The confusion, the sensation of emptiness, the living nightmare of being a ticking time bomb, it was all going to fade away and become a dream, or a memory.

"My memories are nothing but a dream now." Fang muttered bitterly. "Both mine and Vanille's and it's all thanks to that damned Focus!" Lightning released her before she could forcefully break free. She turned around to face the soldier; a neutral expression decorated her face. She looked away and turned back to the water, her hands on her hips again as she continuously shifted her weight, slowly moving around in a small circle.

_~I've reached the end, everything's gone~  
~There's no time left for confusion~_

"We made it to the end, and everything was taken from us. Even if we complete this Focus, save or destroy Cocoon, everything will just be taken away again. It's just a damned cycle of misery." She stopped and stared at the ground. "No, you guys killed Anima didn't you?" she looked over her shoulder, Lightning didn't respond. "Then that's it, the cycle is done, it's either Cie'th or crystal."

"Fang." Light started, she went ignored. The lancer continued to ramble to herself causing Lightning to cross her arms again. For a split second she spotted her cape on the ground, Fang must have too, the Pulsian stopped her pacing to pick up the material and study it. She then looked at Lightning with slight confusion; she bit her bottom lip as Fang's eyes narrowed, finally, a smirk appearing on the warrior's face.

"This material, it certainly isn't military issued, is it?" she asked grinning, Light's steel-blue eyes went wide for a moment before narrowing, Fang knew, if it was anyone else, they'd be blushing. Roles where shifting back to what they should be, and Fang was enjoying it. Light's hands clenched and unclenched; now that the black sleeve was gone Fang noticed the faded scar carved into her forearm. Deciding to press on that later, she rolled the corner of the red cape in her fingers. "It's not cotton... silk, isn't it?"

Lightning didn't respond, she simply walked up to Fang and stole the article out of her hand. She didn't fasten it back onto her jacket; she just held it in her hand, staring at it.

"So... what's the story behind it?" Fang asked in a sing-song tone. Lightning just looked away.

"No story." She responded, Fang tilted her head to the side, Light's eyes rolled as she turned around.

"Aha! There is something! A memory!" she pointed at the soldier, her grin only grew, Lighting huffed.

"More like a dream." Light answered, turning back to face the ever triumphant Fang. "It's just... it's nothing."

"It was Claire's, wasn't it?"

_~My heart is broken~_

Fang saw Lightning tense, like a shock just ran through system. Fear was apparent on her face while Fang took on the expression of confusion. For once Lightning looked absolutely lost for words as she tried to form something to say, if anything, it looked like the soldier wanted to run. Light turned around and exhaled loudly before turning back, now she was angry.

"Where did you hear that?!"

"Hear what?" Fang asked, Light's hands flinched slightly, like she wanted to strangle the warrior. "You mean, that name?" she asked again, the sudden flash of frustration Lightning released was all she needed. "Serah said it, when I carried her out of the temple." She answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Silence fell for a second before she was struck with a revelation, why she didn't put two and two together sooner was beyond her.

_~I wish I could open my eyes~_

She _had_ been a couple different people. By the time she realized she had been standing around with a dumbstruck look on her face, Lightning had already gathered her boots and was walking away. Fang didn't shout, she didn't even bother to grab her stuff, she just ran after the soldier. Lightning's speed wasn't something Fang could easily overtake; it got to a point that she had to watch the yellow bands in the distance disappear into the old school house. Stopping in front of the building she looked up, she could see the yellow glow on the roof.

_~and find some place for me to hide~_

She slowly walked into the building, trying not to make a sound, but she knew Lightning would know that she was here. While they were basically even when it came to comforting one another, she needed to make up for that mistake she had made, although, could she call it a mistake? Probably not, she didn't know and she definitely didn't expect Lightning to react the way she did. Slowly scaling the stairs, tuning her ears to try and hear anything. To her surprise, she heard Light's voice, faint but carrying the same tune she had earlier.

"_More than just friends... but that's not quite right either... the word 'bond' is more appropriate, while fighting with each other..."_ her voice died away again, Fang assumed she was quoting something, but she didn't know what. No one had heard Lightning go off like this, maybe it was something she did to keep herself occupied while on duty. Maybe it was something to keep Claire alive.

"I know you're standing there Fang." Lightning's voice snapped, Fang sighed and walked fully onto the roof. She had her arms crossed and was tapping her foot on the ground, like she was waiting for a child to explain what they had just done wrong.

"Look Light, I didn't mean... I didn't think."

"I'm not looking for an explanation or an apology."

_~for all I've done and walked away~  
~There's no much hope for me to pray~_

Lightning watched as Fang's expression went from surprise to confusion, then back to that usual smirk she had plastered on her face. She closed the distance between them slightly, by this point Lightning would have faltered at the proximity, but after everything that had just happened, this was nothing to her when it came to Fang these days. The silence continued, Light expected Fang to press on about the cape, but she didn't.

The red material, it did once belong to Claire. It used to be a part of an old knight costume her mother had made for her when she was young. Three years after her death, Serah was cleaning out the basement and stumbled upon it in a box. Thankful for once that her sister was away on a mission, she snagged one of her sister's uniform jackets and with some matching leather, styled the silk that had originally served as a scarf into the slim cape. When Lightning had returned home from her mission, Serah presented it to her, the older Farron took it as some kind of a joke; but Serah won out in the end. Lightning had became what Claire always wanted to be, therefore she could at _least_ keep a part of Claire on her in memory, if it wasn't for her sake; it was for Serah's sake.

It was always for Serah's sake.

"So who's trying to hide? You or Claire?" Fang asked when she noticed Lightning was basically hugging herself around the waist. The Farron didn't answer; instead Fang grabbed her shoulders and pulled her in for a proper hug. Light's hands slowly moved to return the hug, back to square one it seemed, but everything between them felt so much different now.

_Maybe we are more than just friends..._

_~There's a place for me to hide~_

"Neither of us, not anymore." Lightning whispered, nuzzling, if it was possible for the ex-soldier to do so, closer to Fang. The other woman's hand made it up to Lightning's hair to hold her head closer to her shoulder, the same way she had hugged Vanille earlier. "We've found our place."

"Those words you told me earlier, about being more than just friends..." Fang started, Lightning hummed again.

"_If there aren't any stars, let's just become stars while making fun of each other... while..."_ Lightning stopped again, the hand in her hair moved to lift her chin just slightly so she was looking directly at Fang.

_~I know, I know~_

"_While loving one another..." _Fang whispered before pressing her lips against Lightning's, the soldier didn't freeze, she didn't push away; she just returned the affection.

_~There's a place for me to hide~_

Just like the time before, when she woke up on top of the sleeping Fang, nothing was coming together to explain how she was feeling right now. Unlike last time, there wasn't a part of her to run away, she had already fulfilled that desire. She raised her hands off Fang's waist a brought one to the middle of her back and the other to the back of her neck while the kiss deepened.

_Everything has faded away..._

There was nothing to say, everything was right, everything was perfect.

_~I wish I could open my eyes~  
~I'm on my own for way too long~  
~There's no time left for confusion~_

Hope held onto the railing with a shaking hand, he couldn't believe what he had stumbled on... what he was seeing. The pain in his chest was almost unbearable. Hanging his head, he tried to fight back his tears. His mother... and Lightning... was everything he loved going to be taken away from him in one form or another? Biting his lip, a pair of slim arms hugged him from behind.

"Please... don't cry Hope, it makes me sad too." Vanille whispered, sweetly, but in a comforting tone at the same time.

_~My heart is broken~

* * *

_

**Fire: **Finished this on a bus, and god damn, the roof was leaking water on me. This chapter was a little harder to do because of the theme and the way the song played; I actually had to cut some of the song out. The next chapter will probably up the rating to T because of violence and swearing.

I will be putting download links for the songs in my profile, as soon as the internet decides to cooperate with me.

**Chapter Song: **No Time Left for Confusion  
**Artist:** Your Favorite Enemies

**Disclaimer:** Everything used belongs to their rightful owners


	3. we're out of breath we're left behind

_**Reposted 05/16/10:**__ Accidentally deleted when I wanted to repost, fixed errors**, extended AN at bottom.**__**  
Fire:**__ This song is different than the other ones, leading to a more action-based chapter than a dramatic one. So the feeling found in the last two chapters might be absent in this one, however, I think you'll be pleased with the ending.

* * *

_

_No proof concerning..._

_No proof concerning..._

_No...  
No proof concerning..._

_Concerning a...  
Concerning..._

_A weapon of mass destruction...  
No traces found..._

_Has been reported..._

_No proof concerning a weapon of mass destruction has been reported._

_All false emitted... _

_I repeat...

* * *

_

**if I was to die in the morning...**

_Love is a promise whispering goodbye. Waiting for you to hold me tight, I need one more wish before Wonderland fades...  
and if I was to die in the morning... would I still be sleeping with you?

* * *

_

_It all..._

_It all has been denied..._

Hope kicked the fallen speaker that was playing the message on a constant static loop. He usually wasn't one to carry out random acts of violence against inanimate objects. What was irritating him were the two other people on his team. He wasn't thrilled that he couldn't go with Sazh and Vanille as the party going the other way around Eden; Lightning had insisted that the teams should be as balanced as possible and these were the only groups they could come up with.

He really didn't want to be with Lightning and Fang, not after what he had stumbled on just several nights before. The teams after that day... he was always with Vanille as Sazh and Snow alternated back and forth, they had gotten strong enough that they didn't need a medic or a sentinel around all the time as they battled.

Right now they were wandering a ruined highway and probably used to lead to the center of the city, however, with the collapse of the main road, it had all fallen into a major mess; civilians wandered the streets in despair while others just constantly complained about anything and everything. Lightning had taken point and was leading the group of three; Fang was unusually close to her while Hope brought up the rear several meters behind them.

He just, he just couldn't get that image out of his head, what he had seen on the school roof... that Light was... that Lightning was...

"_Hope!"_

The shout of his name snapped him out of his stupor, eyes wide he saw that Lightning had turned around and was running at him, her eyes weren't trained on him, but what was behind him. He turned around, unable to get a hand on Nue, just in time to see that a group of Sanctum Archangels had their guns trained on them; one in particular was on his forehead.

He knew Lightning was a sufficient medic, but not strong enough to heal a bullet to the head. An Eidolon might be able to, but it wasn't worth testing that theory. With a shaking hand he tried to grab onto his boomerang in his back pocket, but he just wasn't getting the grip and the fingers were curling around the trigger...

"You're mine!"

He heard Lightning call out and about half the soldiers flinched, two seconds later the others had too. Right after the gun that was trained on Hope had shifted to point at Lightning. She was standing beside him with her gunblade over her shoulder. He opened his mouth to say something but the Archangels fired. Snapping her fingers before scooping him up under his arm, she avoided the bullets with her infamous ability to defy gravity whenever she pleased. He stammered her name in surprise as she placed him down behind a large piece of rubble, over her shoulder he could see Fang striking the soldiers down with her lance. Lightning stood up and gave Hope a nod before jumping back into the fray.

"Cut them down." Lightning commanded as the L'Cie brand on Fang's shoulder shone red for a second; the one on his arm glowed purple. It was amazing how the brands worked in unison at times, at the start of the battle they would always shift to a role suitable for the start of the conflict, after that it was up to the L'Cie to shift through different roles and move sets. Drawing Haste into his hand, he released it over himself before drawing two more, one in each hand. Buffing like this was always easier when he wasn't holding onto Nue. He released them over his comrades, seeing the familiar red clockwork surround them in his mind's eye.

That was the one thing about the Synergist and the Saboteur roles, they always saw something the others couldn't, as if the brand was telling them that their buff or debuff had succeeded or failed.

"All out!" Fang roared, Hope noted the call and his band released a blue aura; instead of a Protect spell charging in his hands, it transformed into an Aero, all of his buffs did that. Lightning flipped through the air as a blue light slipped through the material of her brown sweater. He finally pulled Nue out of his pocket and vaulted over the rock as Lightning still moved backwards, defying gravity as she shot an arrangement of spells, trying to figure out what the Archangels were weak against.

"Reinforcements!" the supposed leader of the attack group shouted as more men were dropped in from the aircraft above. Hope's posture slumped for a moment, were the other guys having it this bad as well?

"Fuck." Fang growled as she speared one in the chest and threw the body onto the ground, blood flying as she stabbed another. Lightning launched herself forward, her hidden brand sparked red for a moment before she cut down a handful of soldiers with a flourish of steel.

"This is getting a little ridiculous." She commented, shaking the blood off her gunblade. The soldiers just surrounded them all, Hope lost count after twenty. Subconsciously his brand glowed green while he took two steps back. Lightning lifted her blade to rest over her shoulder, Hope missed it, but her hidden brand flashed for a moment.

"Oh no, we're just getting started!" Fang shouted, releasing her crystal from her mark and shattering it right afterwards. The soldiers hesitated as the light expanded and rose up to form a series of glyphs in the darkening sky.

"Bahamut!" Fang roared as her Eidolon dove down from the sky, roaring. The soldiers were in a panic the moment the dragon started to attack.

"The devil! The... the... the demons! They're back!" some of the men roared in a mess of words, stumbling backwards, Hope watched as Fang went on the full assault, striking down whoever got in her way or those Bahamut had missed, beside him, Lightning was picking them off one by one with her gun.

_Wasn't all of this originally a celebration of a new era?_

"Happy fucking New Year to you too." Fang sneered as she killed the commanding officer.

_~Happy New Year, we said trembling~  
~the devil's back, back here again~_

"So, just..." Hope started as he stared at the dead bodies that littered the ground, no matter how long he would stay with Fang or Lightning, he could never get over the amount of death they left behind. Snow would only beat them to submission and Sazh wouldn't shoot to kill unless it was a monster; but these two would easily kill another man the moment he pointed the barrel of his gun at them.

He had to look away; the two had taken the few seconds of downtime to rummage through the fallen bodies, picking off whoever had survived and whatever items they could. Lightning always did that for bullets, he had learnt that back when he had first followed her, but what did Fang possibly need off Sanctum Soldiers?

_~Ripping your flesh, dressed as a friend~  
~don't you see, we're struggling~_

"Hope." He heard Lightning say his name. Snapping out of his daze, he looked at her, but quickly looked away after that. "Is something wrong?" she asked, he shook his head.

"It's nothing."

"Bullshit."

That had come from Fang; she didn't even look at them as she dusted off her clothing and straightened out the material so it sat properly on her body. Hope looked at Lightning again, he shook his head and before he knew it, her gloved hands were on his shoulders. Their time was limited now; he had to get it out before Lightning forced them all on the move again.

"Do we really have to kill them all?" he released in a single breath, he wanted to say more, much more, but he'd rather run it past Sazh and Snow first. "I mean, they have families too." He hung his head; Lightning removed her hands and took a few steps back. Fang made a slight sound of confusion; Hope finally looked up to see Lightning's back facing him. Her hands on her hips, she leaned forward and sighed, like as if she was trying to choose the right words to say. Of course, with her background in the military, she would know how the fallen were treated.

"_Would you, a lifetime awaiting you, know how you should live?" _she started to say, looking at Hope once before moving her hand over to the sea of fresh bodies. _"Then... look here, and look all about you... where only heroes rest."_ She had closed her eyes for the last part; Hope titled her head to the side. "My superior had told me just that, right after my first funeral for a fallen comrade."

"What a fitting end for a dog." Fang sneered. Lightning shot her a glare but it went ignored.

"It's a constant struggle, kill or be killed. As long as you can pull the trigger before the other guy, your comrade won't be deciding how to bury you." Lightning muttered as she turned on the ball of her foot and took point again. In the distance they could see the beasts of Gran Pulse tearing apart the city.

_~Fishbowl, casket and golden cage~  
~we're all fighting the best we can~_

They were too fast for him to keep up, before; Lightning would take stealth over bloodshed, however the two women before him were jumping from fray to fray, slaying man and beast alike. To his distaste, Fang was howling with laughter every time she would kill something and there was that extra bounce in Lightning's movements as she moved around the battlefield, the weapon in her hand always transforming back and forth.

He wasn't even fighting and he was already out of breath. Doubling over the moment he had caught up to them he didn't see what had stopped the other two L'Cie from continuing their playful bloodshed throughout the streets of Eden.

"Well this looks fun." He didn't know who said it; his mind was too boggled to comprehend as he slowly looked up.

_You have got to be kidding..._

Countless soldiers had lined up to block their path, all of them were standing in a perfect formation with their guns trained on them, most of them being on Lightning the moment she shifted so her shoulder armour that bore her rank was visible to all of them. He didn't know how word worked with the military, but maybe Lightning was a little notorious in the other regiments.

"Drop your weapons L'Cie!" one of them commanded. Lightning sighed and casually strolled forward a bit, her Omega Weapon still in her tight grip. Hope made a move to run forward but Fang stopped him with an extended hand.

"She's gonna make a gamble."

_For what?_

"Drop your weapon L'Cie!" the one soldier shouted again, breaking away from the group and holding a steady aim at Lightning.

"Who needs a gun to kill?"

_~Gambling soul for empty wage~  
~who needs a gun to kill a man~_

It was like watching in slow motion, and it horrified Hope. Lightning held her Omega Weapon out and had her other hand on her chest. The moment her gunblade slipped from her fingers the soldier fired, Hope thought Fang would at least cry out Lightning's name in horror, after all, isn't that what lovers do for each other in situations like this?

No.

_~Won't buy your bullshit, we don't mind~_

Fang laughed.

The bullet struck Lightning.

Hope screamed.

_~we're out of breath, we're left behind~_

The Farron's body moved backwards, lifelessly, Fang moved her hand away from Hope and he stumbled, landing on his knees.

He _hated_ Fang for grinning.

_~what we believe is more than you know~_

Then it was like a cue, a familiar echoing snap filled the air and a pink light erupted where Lightning once stood. Hope watched as Lightning, who was alive and well; flip in the air with the aid of her Grav-Con unit that was embedded in her fingers as Fang darted forward. The warrior spun around once as her lance caught Lightning's feet and launched her into the air while Odin began to form in the crystal light.

"Oi! Light!" Fang shouted as she stomped her foot down on the ex-soldier's gunblade. At the same time Odin had extended his hand to capture Lightning's hand before swinging her downwards and back up into the air. Hope watched in amazement, like it was a choreographed dance. Lightning had seized her weapon on the downward swing and preformed a couple acrobatic flips in the air as Zantetsuken formed in Odin's right hand and his shield on his left arm.

"Cut us a path!" Lightning roared as she landed on the ground, swinging her sword out, Odin shadowing her movements.

_~Speed up your track, here comes the flow~_

Hope stayed on his knees as he watched the two warriors and the Eidolon Knight destroy the small army before them. Each one dropped at the sound of singing steel, one of the soldiers was bold enough to try and use a rocket launcher at the Eidolon, but Odin cleaved through the attack and the attacker like a hot knife on butter.

Why wasn't the Sanctum calling off their men? The more they threw out the more Fang laughed, the more amused Lightning started to look. This was a war they were supposed to be struggling with and the two were having fun! They were toying with the army, flirting with each other... leaving him behind.

He shook his head, they weren't really leaving him behind; he was lagging behind. If Snow was here instead, he'd be right up in the fun and games with them, Sazh would be complaining, but supporting them with countless buffs as he struggled to chase after them. Vanille....

Vanille would fight beside them like a united team they should be.

_~Whole lot of fun, like birds we've fed~  
~Blessed Americans, united we stand~_

"Light." He started when they had stopped again to check over their supplies, it was strongly noted that Lightning was almost out of bullets and one of the blades off Fang's lance had snapped off.

"What's the matter?" she asked, her voice as soft as it could get when it concerned him. He swayed back and forth a bit, his gloved hands rubbing against his pants. Vanille had told him if it was too much to deal with, face it later. He felt like he couldn't hold it off anymore, he needed to say something. Lightning gave him a steady look, she was waiting and he was stalling.

"It's... uhh... it..."

"It's about us isn't it?" Fang asked him, waving a finger between Lightning and herself. Hope found himself extremely uncomfortable now, what was he going to say? His hands balled into fists as he hung his head. So they knew he knew, what was he supposed to say?

"You're too young to kill Hope, that's why we're doing it, so you don't have to." Lightning said, walking forward to rest her hands on his shoulders again. "We're not going to leave you behind, not now, not ever."

Was he supposed to lie now?

"No, Light, it's not like that." He muttered. "I like you Light, I really do, I just don't really understand and..." he stopped when Lightning pulled him into a hug.

"_Mom?"_

"_Not by a long shot."_

_~In front of a world, craving for bread~  
~Speaking of God with empty hands~_

"Alright you two." Fang sighed in annoyance just seconds after Lightning had hugged Hope. The soldier glanced at the lancer who spared her a knowing grin. She released the younger boy and studied his features for a moment, she could easily tell that he didn't manage to say everything he wanted to say, but it was still troubling him. Light didn't pay much mind and figured he will say everything he wanted to when he felt that he was ready.

"Are you okay now?" Light asked Hope, he nodded weakly.

"Everything still feels impossible." He muttered, she shook her head with a sigh.

"Think that, and you'll be the next one dead." She smirked, nudging him gently in the chest; he stared at her for a moment before nodding in agreement. She stood up and claimed point again, Fang rushed to meet her while Hope brought up the rear. "We're almost at the rendezvous point." Light muttered as she reloaded her gunblade, never getting the chance to do so earlier.

"We should leave the children with Sazh, they'll be able to find their way around without getting into much trouble." Fang reasoned with her, Light sighed and bit the inside of her lip.

"It would probably be the best bet; it will put us down a strong medic though." Lightning answered back, Fang just shrugged her shoulders before leaning closer to Light, and the Farron could feel her breath on her ear.

"Maybe we can just leave Hope with the others and..." a chuckle. "Disappear for a while."

"When we're done here Fang." Lightning muttered back, she wasn't aware that after all of this, they might not get another chance. No matter how hard they were to fight at the end, it was either going to be Cie'th or Crystal.

There wasn't going to be a tomorrow.

_~Fishbowl, casket and golden cage~  
~we're all fighting the best we can~_

Fang watched as Lightning pressed forward, her walk as perfect as usual. Sparing a glance over her shoulder she saw Hope rubbing his hands together as he followed, his eyes trained on the ground.

"_It'd be great if we could smile tomorrow too..." _Fang heard Lightning mutter, the Pulsian quickening her pace to fall into step with the ex-soldier. _"Heart-breaking... painful... we don't know when we're going to die..."_

"Light?" Fang heard Hope ask the other woman. Lightning stopped walking for a moment to place her hands on her hips and give the ground a half-hearted kick. Fang crossed her own arms while the young boy approached them.

"Nothing..." Light murmured turning around, Fang huffed.

"Similar tune... that's Claire's song, isn't it?" she asked, Lightning froze again.

"Claire? Who's Claire?" Hope asked quickly, Lightning was more tense than usual; it was actually visible in her muscles this time around. "Light? Was Claire someone you and Serah knew?"

"Claire's gone Hope; she's just an old memory." Light answered before pressing forward, or tried to. Fang placed her hand on Lighting's shoulder and spun her around. To Hope's utter horror, Fang had pressed her lips against Lightning's and the soldier _returned_ the kiss.

_It wasn't a nightmare._

He watched for a second before bending down on the ground, covering his head with his gloved hands, shaking. This wasn't right; this isn't what his teachers had taught him in class. A man and a woman, it was always said that it was between a man and a woman; but clearly, before him was _Lightning_ and _Fang._ Was this right or wrong? Vanille had told him that night that Fang was _different_ than most women, but Hope just figured it was because she acted so similar to Lightning; and even then, _Lightning_ was different than most women he had ever met.

_Oh... oh man..._

"Fang." Lightning's voice snapped, Hope didn't bother to look up, but he could hear the faint sound of a zipper being done up. "Hope's right there and now is not the time." She said in a tone Hope was all too familiar with.

"But Light... I just wanted to get your mind off Claire." Fang whined, if it was even possible for the Pulsian, Hope just held his hands closer to his head, trying to ignore whoever bent down beside him and placed a comforting hand on his back.

"Leave me alone." Hope muttered, there was a slight shift of fabric.

"I'll roll him." Fang offered Hope knew she was smirking; there was a sigh from Lightning as her hand was removed from his back.

"Between the two of you, I don't know who the bigger handful is." She sighed, Hope didn't move but he could hear the footsteps and the rustle of fabric as Fang gave off a hum.

"You know I am, love." Hope knew, he just knew Fang had pecked Lightning on the cheek when she had said that, just because of the way Lightning chose to exhale right after! Can't they just stop with the flirting already? He's only fourteen and not used to experiencing _this_ kind of romance!

"I... I wanna go with Snow." Hope managed to say after a minute, moving so he was sitting on the ground, refusing to make eye contact with either woman. Snow would know, Snow would know what to say. Lightning sighed and there was a snap of two-way transmitter being opened. There was the sound of footsteps, Lightning weight being shifted side to side, but he never removed his gaze from the floor.

"I'm not your sister."

Well that was always one way to answer the phone.

"Siren Park is just up ahead; meet us there and we'll reform." Lightning snapped before closing the device, a slight chuckle came from Fang.

"At least you're not shouting into it this time, soldier."

"Shut up." Lightning snapped before Hope found himself roughly jerked on the arm and pulled to his feet. Why did she have to go all sergeant on him now?

"Don't touch me."

His words seemed to have snapped something inside of Lightning, what it was, he didn't know. She was bending down beside him again, this time he was thankful that the two women had decided to kill everything in their path. Hope didn't know what they were thinking, but eventually, Lightning stood back up.

"It's Fang and I, isn't it?"

"Aww isn't that-"

"Don't think of finishing that." Lightning snapped, Fang held her hands up in response, still with that knowing grin on her face. Hope bit down on his lower lip. "That's what you meant before, isn't it?" Light looked at Fang but the other woman just shrugged her shoulders without a care in the world. Lightning looked away, unable to answer the silent question for once.

"I won't abandon you, I won't." She finally mustered in a whisper. "I just don't love you the same way you _think_ you love me."

Hope nodded weakly and finally stood up. Siren Park wasn't that far away, and Lightning had said Snow and the others would meet them there. Chances were, he and Sazh would trade places on the teams, but Vanille knew Fang better than anyone else, and Snow knew Lightning before everything had happened, so talking to the two of them would be his best bet.

"Okay..." He muttered, Lightning granted him one of her rare smirks.

Reaching the park wasn't as hard as Hope thought it was going to be, he hung back as Lightning and Fang tackled everything as a double Commando. Both of them were nice enough to avoid unnecessary head-cleaving as they killed. They only stopped to grab bullets and various shrouds and potions they moved, the Sanctum had tried another way to bock the road but one good Quake from Lightning was more than enough to upset both teams, just the Sanctum didn't have the same knack for survival that the L'Cie did.

_~Gambling soul for empty wage~  
~who needs a gun to kill a man~_

The next Archangel team found themselves surrounded by both teams of L'Cie. The commander charged at Lightning who simply deflected his weapon before driving her gunblade home in his chest. She kicked the body off as both Fang and Snow ambushed the team, Fang leaving more blood behind than Snow. Hope watched as Lightning held her sword over her shoulder and started to provoke the countless men that surrounded them.

"Hope! Over here!" he heard Vanille call out to him, waving at him from behind a large piece of concrete with Sazh. He could tell that the older man was acting as a Synergist while Vanille was using her sabotage abilities to help the team. On the field Snow and Fang were taking on the countless Sanctum men with their physical strength while Lightning dodged and deflected everything they threw at her after she had provoked them.

"Hey now, since when did Soldier Girl become a Sentinel?" Sazh asked, as the brand on his chest glowed blue, right after he dumped a handful of fire spells on a small group of soldiers that had their backs turned on them.

"Oh great Sazh!" Vanille complained. "You just gave away our hiding spot!"

_~Won't buy your bullshit, we don't mind~_

"Change of plan!" Lightning roared out, it was like she knew they were on the last wave and were able to go all out. How long had they been at this? Hope didn't know, he was out of breath again. Vanille was leaning against the wall beside him while Sazh looked worse for wear.

"I think they need a medic there Hope." Sazh muttered. "Soldier Girl there is losing a lot of blood and they aren't giving her the time to heal herself." He commented, firing off a couple rounds, pegging one of the men in the back. Hope bit his lip and looked over the rock. Snow had taken back his role of Sentinel and the yellow energy from his Steelguard was deflecting bullets left right and center. Fang was little slower with her movements, the blood on her leg explained everything. It seemed that the Sanctum had decided to corner the L'Cie and pump out men like an assembly line until the L'Cie were tired out, and then finally slay them.

And it was working.

Lightning had sheathed her gunblade and was throwing spells with her right hand, something she wasn't used to doing, while her left arm hung uselessly at her side, the black sleeve she wore was soaked with blood. Hope watched as the red liquid rolled down her fingertips.

"They've got us good." Sazh commented, unloading a clip into the back of another Archangel. "So Hope, gonna do anything about that, or are you gonna let Soldier Girl bleed to death?"

"Why me? Vanille's a medic too, she could."

"Hope." Vanille muttered his name in a tone neither were familiar with. Hope closed his mouth and she spared the second to hug him. "It broke my heart the first time too."

"Now who's breaking whose hearts?" Sazh asked in that flippant tone of his. Vanille giggled.

"I'm sure your first love broke you heart too Sazh!"

"Ahh... don't start sending this old man down memory lane now, ya hear?" Sazh complained stomping on the ground as he launched an Aero across the field, Hope sighed in defeat as his brand glowed green, Vanille was still smiling and holding onto his hand.

"I'll help ya too." She offered as she released his hand, he nodded weakly before drawing a Curaja into his hands and releasing it over the others. Fang's limp disappeared instantly as she threw herself forward at full force. After two more combined rounds from the two medics, Lightning had regained movement in her left arm, and with silent thanks, pulled out her gunblade again.

Then the last wave came.

Sazh lost his grip on his gun for a moment, nearly shooting himself in the foot. Two Sanctum Templars marched onto the beaten road, several Seraphs and Inquisitrixs at their side. The group of L'Cie took a step back in hesitation, even with medics and endless buffs, they were all physically exhausted, and nothing could cure that.

_~we're out of breath, we're left behind~_

"We do this together." Lightning exclaimed in her usual tone of voice. Both Snow and Fang nodded in agreement before they moved in harmony to take out the weaker soldiers. Beside him, Vanille was tossing debuffs to cancel out the Inquisitrixs' buffs while Sazh was renewing everyone's buffs.

Hope balled his free hand into a fist. Even though Lightning, unknowingly, broke his heart, they were still a ragtag group of friends he had learned to call family over the last little while. He charged a Waterga in his hand and threw it over, upsetting the Sanctum. Lightning had foreseen his attack and jumped out of the way and used Fang's lance as a vault to get her up high enough to kill two of the launched soldiers.

"We gotta win this!" Snow shouted, slamming his fist into the helmet of a Seraph, drawing blood, he knew he killed the man.

"I've heard that line too many times from you." Lightning snapped, Fang took the moment to make a mock salute, but Lightning's glare stopped her from saying anything. Farron got back into her stance as the two Templars got into their stances. Quickly and suddenly, Lightning snapped her fingers and charged at one of the Templars

Fang quickly pivoted on the ball of her foot and leapt back as Lightning got into range of the Templar, moving her sword in a downward motion.

"It ends here!" she roared and broke out into the attack pattern for her signature move, _Army of One_. After the first stage, Hope heard a snapping sound as the Templar staggered, everyone, except Fang, had their brands shift to glow blue. After Lightning's second stage there was a second snap, Snow and Sazh's brands flashed red. Hope stared at his, yes; he was going to make everyone proud. His brand flashed red as he charged a Ruin in his hand.

_~what we believe is more than you know~_

Lightning landed on the ground, the body crashing beside her. She stood up fully but stumbled right after, falling onto her knee, the remaining Templar laughed. She ghosted her hand down and felt blood, unconsciously, her brand flashed green as she pumped regenerative spells into the wound.

"Light!" Fang snapped her name in concern, running over, but the ex-soldier held up her hand to stop her.

"Watch your back! I'll be fine!"

"Fine my ass!" Fang snapped back, spinning around to block the Templar's lance with her own. The larger man roared; his Manadrive kicking into high gear. Fang threw a list of profane words at the soldier as they struggled to overcome one another. Fang felt her knees start to give.

"Fang!"

Snow tackled into the other woman, knocking her away just as her lance shattered. The Templar's blade snagged the end of Snow's coat, ripping the hem as he pushed off Fang and jumped onto his feet.

"Try that on me!"

"You're crazy!"

"You're unarmed!" Snow shouted back as he deflected the Templar's wild swing. A combined torrent of spells flew over from the side the other three were taking refuge, throwing the man off just long enough for Snow to distance himself and for Fang to scoop up the lance that belonged to the dead Templar.

"Cheers." Fang sneered and unleashed a barrage of ruin spells at the attacker. The piece of trash in her other hand didn't resonate with her power like the other one had; the drop in power was beyond noticeable. The soldier noticed this and ignored Snow's endless list of mundane threats to charge at her. A squawk of surprise from Fang made the Templar laugh as he held his weapon over his head.

"Like hell!" Lightning roared.

The Templar was thrown off by a combined Waterga spell from Snow and the other two mages as Lightning followed up with a Thundrga. Sazh tried to finish with his _Cold Blood_ but after firing two blanks, they knew it was impossible.

"Damn..."

"My turn." The Templar sneered; he moved his body like he had never taken a beating in the first place. Fang could only groan inwardly as he went on the attack.

_~Speed up your track, here comes the flow~_

"Snow!"

"Sis?" the blonde asked, confused as the ex-soldier charged at him. It slowly clued in when he saw the Sanctum Templar fly at him, ready to kill.

"Fuck..."

The Templar's lance drew blood.

"Alexander! Please! Help us!"

* * *

_No...  
No proof concerning..._

_No proof concerning a weapon of mass destruction has been reported.  
I..._

_I repeat.  
It all has been denied._

It was just the two of them now. No one would even dare to move Lightning after the damage she had taken to save Snow's life. Both Vanille and Hope had offered to hang back to help but Fang denied them both. With her lance destroyed she was as useful as an empty gun, Sazh was still able to fight because of his Ravager abilities, but hers weren't up to par. Snow knew that they needed to split up and double back to reequip themselves and have Lightning heal before they pressed forward.

Lightning was still coherent enough to turn Snow's mess of a plan into something usable. Sazh and Vanille was to go one way fix up their weapons while Snow and Hope would go the other way to see what they could salvage, but Fang knew it was because Hope wanted to talk to Snow for rather, personal, reasons. Lightning never failed to deliver, even if it would result in her death.

_~Beautifully falling apart, the circle is complete~_

"I really thought you hated the oaf." Fang commented, running her hand through the soldier's tangled mess of pink hair. She drew a simple Cure spell into her hand and as gently as possible, for the lancer, she pressed it against the bandaged wound on Light's stomach. Lightning hissed in pain while Fang simply rolled her eyes. "So? Why let yourself get skewered to save the man you've sworn to kill in your spare time?"

"I wasn't thinking." Lightning muttered, pushing up and trying to edge backwards so she could lean against Fang, the warrior sighed and helped her, just ghosting her hands over the wound. "I think I did it for Serah's sake."

"Isn't it always?" Fang smirked, Lightning laughed lightly. The Pulsian had learned to treasure the sound over the last few days; it was something Light had only reserved for her. Slowly, Lightning raised her good arm and touched Fang's cheek, her hand slowly moved and buried into her hair before pulling her down to meet her lips.

_~we're the blood feeding the soil, the dust under your feet~_

"You don't think Light, you just do." Fang whispered when they broke apart, Light smirked. They had shifted so she was leaning against the wall as Fang hovered above her. Lightning gasped softly as Fang's fingers traced down her body, toying with the healing wound, but not enough that it would hurt. Fang captured her lips in a bruising kiss while she forced another Cure into the wound, Lightning reacted to the touch, causing the warrior to grin, but Light pulled away instead.

_~Too much, never enough, there's no space between~  
~what you want and what we need~_

"If I was to die in the morning..." Lightning asked slowly, her hands slipped to hold onto Fang's clothing as her eyes moved downward. "Would I still be sleeping with you?"

Fang hummed softly as she brought up her hand to hold Lightning's head up slightly. Her soft smile countered Light's somber expression as she leaned in.

"Always."

_~Too much, never enough, there's no space between~  
~what you want and what we need~

* * *

_

**Fire:** Too damn long, this took too damn long to do. I didn't mean for it to turn out like this, it wasn't my original idea, but I think it worked. I needed to touch on the Lightning/Hope relationship after the way I ended the last chapter.

Hrm... oh, I've posted links to download these songs in my profile, some are in the 'rar' format though.

Next chapter... would you rather if I kept following my original idea, or wander off in the path this story seems to be going? I'm a little bit torn. Impending Doom, you know.

**Chapter Song: **Left Behind  
**Artist:** Your Favorite Enemies

"_Would you, a lifetime awaiting you, know how you should live? Then... look here, and look all about you... where only heroes rest." – __**Steven Harper, Prime Minister of Canada**_

**Disclaimer:** Everything used belongs to their rightful owners


	4. need one more wish before goodbye

**Fire:** I think... well... the story definitely went off track, hope I don't disappoint... one more left after this...

* * *

**if I was to die in the morning...**

_Love is a promise whispering goodbye. Waiting for you to hold me tight, I need one more wish before Wonderland fades...  
and if I was to die in the morning... would I still be sleeping with you?

* * *

_

They had been gone for a while now. Fang didn't care. The widespread panic that consumed the streets of Eden was still on a full rampage, but the small stretch of road she and Lightning had taken refuge in was as dead as ever. Over the last few hours, Light had recovered fully and the two were slowly learning, worshipping; each other's body. Neither of them discarded any clothing, they didn't want the situation to be more embarrassing than it needed to be when they were finally discovered.

Fang knew fully what Lightning had meant when she had asked that question earlier, and it broke the warrior's heart. When this battle would finally come to an end and the morning after came, it would be crystal for them all. She was already granted the so-called 'eternal life' but they would be as good as dead. Sleep, dreams, that's all they had left.

Lightning would never leave her dreams, her memories, no matter what happens.

She still needed to say goodbye before it was too late.

_~Streets are filled with lonely ghosts~_

"Light." Fang managed to breathe when they broke away again. This wasn't the first time they had done this, but was the first with the chance of being discovered easily. Both Hope and Vanille knew, and to Fang's relief Vanille had reacted better than Hope did. Yes, the usually cheerful girl did seem crestfallen, but she rebounded quickly, she always did. She never told Vanille, but she thought the same thing Lightning had told Hope earlier that day.

_I love you, but not the same way you think you love me._

She opened her mouth to speak, but Light gently placed a finger over her lip, her bloodied gloves, sleeve and jacket was already removed a long time ago.

"_Listen to my monologue 'From now on, no matter how many years, let's always be together' is all I want to say."_ She sung another segment from Claire's song before giving her a solemn smile. "This isn't goodbye, not now, not ever."

How was she supposed to say it now? Lightning knew, they both knew, because they never say it. She slowly ran her hands across Light's arms, brushing the old scar on her left arm.

_Love is a promise whispering goodbye._

_~Millions of flare up in the air~  
~Colors I've learned to fear the most~_

A silent agreement between the two fighters, they never said it, and hoped, just hoped that they never had to. But Fang knew, she knew she needed to say it. Every time she tried, Lightning would easily pick and hum various lyrics from Claire's song that always seemed to express the situation and stopping Fang.

Nothing in Fang's mind could defeat saying _'I love you_' as the final goodbye. She needed to do it, and she was too scared to do it.

"Light... I..." she tried again; Farron just shook her head in a disapproving fashion.

"We're going to beat this; we made that promise, remember?" she muttered, Fang couldn't agree with her. She was already victim to this cycle once before and was about to fall once again. Now even Lightning was part of this endless cycle of war, someone who shouldn't have been part of it in the first place.

_~Too beautiful for a stranger~_

Groaning when Lightning pressed her lips against the crook of her neck, she roughly pulled her back and captured her in a searing kiss. She didn't need, she didn't want Light's pity, Light's words of false hope. For all she knew, Lightning could be lying to herself as well; it's still impossible... damn, how did that one lyric go?

"I want to hear all of it, see all of it." Fang whispered, finally deciding to speak hopeful words to Lightning, she leaned her forehead against Light's, the pink haired soldier closing her eyes.

"All of..." she left the question hanging, smiling softly.

"Claire's song... your home... all of it." Fang responded; one hand on the left arm scar and the other toying with the knot of the bandage secured tightly around Lightning's usually exposed stomach. Lightning hummed as she leaned in closer to Fang's ear. It was something about the Farron's voice that turned her on.

"_So if it's anywhere beneath the ozone, it's no problem."_ She pulled back, smiling. Fang grinned and pulled her properly onto her lap, hands wandering. "If Claire was still around, she probably would have followed the arts." She explained, Fang just chose the perfect way to react.

"Then I would have never met _Lightning_."

"_Ozone_ is just another secret to keep Claire alive."

_~I've veiled my eyes a thousand times~  
~Hiding secrets deep down inside~  
~I gave up my soul to change the frame~_

Her hands wandered Lightning's wounded body, brushing one finger over the fresh scar. Only Hope and Vanille were strong enough to heal without leaving a single trace behind. She couldn't blame herself for it; it was Lightning's rash decision to use her body as a shield to save Snow's life. "You really are stupid." She mused, earning herself a chuckle.

"A simple, common trait." Light answered, lifting her body up so her head was slightly above Fang's. "You've done stupid things too."

"I'm not denying anything." Fang simply responded. Lightning hummed as she pushed the blue sari off Fang's shoulder, the Pulsian couldn't recall when she had managed to pull down Light's zipper. Fang bit her tongue back from saying anything, deep down she hoped the others had the sense to call before they returned. They both needed this, they didn't care if the sky was inked black with the night; this would probably the only and last chance they'll get before...

_~Midnight's crashing, looks so empty~  
~Need one more wish before goodbye~  
~before goodbye, before goodbye~_

She surrendered herself to the wounded soldier's touch. They shouldn't be doing this, not here, not now. Maybe later... in the future, a future that would never come...

At least, not for her... not for the two of them... only Lightning...

She wanted more, more than this endless apology Lightning was giving her. To push the soldier back and show her how she does it. To prove that this relationship wasn't a typical one, it was an endless battle, hunt or be hunted.

But if she couldn't bring herself to say goodbye, she was just better off letting herself be dominated, just this once. Then Lightning's actions started to change, trying to force Fang to react the way the lancer should be reacting. How could she? She knew that it was only a matter of time before these memories just became another distant dream in crystal sleep.

_~When dreams are filled with hopeless stars~  
~Millions of stars without a shine~_

_Our promised meeting place, 'It's the same as always, right?' Under cover of a cloudy sky, if there aren't any stars, let's just become stars. While making fun of each other, while loving one another..._

'_Say, where are you?' 'Somewhere on Earth.' Since we're no astronauts, so if it's anywhere beneath the ozone it's no problem._

'_Okay, I'm on my way.' You must want to cause a racket until morning in our special haven._

Fang wasn't sure if it was her mind developing the lyrics or if it was Lightning whispering them into her ear as the both explored each other's bodies. Fang just assumed it was Light because there were some words used that she had never heard before. When they had first met not too long ago, and with the way Snow had described her, never, would she have pegged Lightning to have a musical sense in her. Although the way she moved in battle, the way she moved now, they all could have belonged to a diverse dancer.

They were still broken inside, only able to find comfort in each other.

Gasping for air while Light pushed her down; her hands doing things to her body where she couldn't muster the right words to describe, it just left right. Fang closed her eyes when Lightning's lips neared her ear again, her warm breath sending shivers down her spine as she softly spoke.

_~I keep my head close to the ground~_

"I'll become Ragnarok for you... with you." Lightning whispered as she moved over her body. "Anything to keep you with me... because..."

_~Waiting for God whispering...~_

_~"You're mine"~_

Lightning's words hit home. Everything was like a white blur, she finally reacted the way Lightning wanted her to.

They will give up everything to change everything.

* * *

_Love is a promise whispering goodbye._

_~I've veiled my eyes a thousand times~  
~Hiding secrets deep down inside~  
~I gave up my soul to change the frame~_

_Waiting for you to hold me tight, I need one more wish before our Wonderland fades..._

_~Midnight's crashing, looks so empty~  
~Need one more wish before goodbye~_

_And if I was to die in the morning..._

_~Midnight's crashing, looks so empty~  
~the lights are gone, my bones are dry~_

_Would I still be sleeping with you?_

_~Need one more wish before goodbye~  
~before goodbye, before goodbye~

* * *

_

She hated the sensation falling would give someone. There was nothing around you, nothing to hold on to. Just gravity pulling to down, the winds snapping you back to reality; Vanille was scared, everyone was scared. Cocoon was falling. She knew that the only way to save everyone now was through Ragnarok, but even then, it would come at a price.

"Fang." She muttered in a near whimper, they were still with the group, only now would be their last time to be selfish. Fang hummed slightly before pulling her into a fierce hug.

"You're too damn innocent for this."

_~I used to pray, to believe~  
~But it's all the same~_

Vanille couldn't voice her confusion when Fang threw her across the group, she cried out when she crashed into Hope, the younger boy reacting fast enough to lock hands with her. Fang crossed her arms and held a smug look as she started to fall away from the group. Sazh started to shout at her, telling her not make any rash decisions. Vanille already knew deep down, Fang had made this decision a long time ago.

"Fang..."

"Live on for the both of us Vanille." Fang said sincerely as possible, moving further and further away from the group. She was going to try to become Ragnarok alone again just to save her. Her heart broke, she knew the love they shared was that of family, but after being with her for so long, she just couldn't say goodbye. "I love you."

_~Love wasn't made to deceive~_

"Fang!"

Vanille heard the sharp sound when Lightning had snapped her fingers. She kicked away from Snow and flew at the warrior. Fist drawn back, she slammed it across Fang's solemn face.

_~Midnight's crashing, looks so empty~  
~Need one more wish before goodbye~_

"I told you Fang!" Lightning roared as she gripped the front of Fang's clothing. They were moving further and further away from the group. Vanille slowly closed her eyes and bowed her head, feeling Hope's grip tighten against her hand. Her brand was burning and the forming crystal on her body was cooling, mixed sensations, it hurt. She could hear Fang's chuckle, then Snow and Sazh gasp. Right, they didn't know.

_~before~_

"For you... with you... anything to keep you with me because you're mine." Fang responded in a tone Vanille was able to recognize. It was a tone she once used with her. Lightning chuckled, a sound Vanille had never heard before, a beautiful sound.

"You're hopeless."

"Lightning? What the hell are you doing? What about Serah?" Snow roared, Vanille wanted to open her eyes and see what was going on, but she was too scared, she didn't want to see the shattering world around them.

"Take care of Serah for me, she's yours now."

_~A single touch, a perfect score~  
~A burning church with open doors~_

Vanille snapped her eyes open when Hope cried out, nearly pulling her arm from its socket. She saw what she didn't want to see. Ragnarok.

The beast roared out as it stood on a falling platform, a perfect combination of the two Eidolons, Bahamut and Odin... Fang and Lightning.

_~goodbye~_

"I... I love you too." Vanille managed to whisper as the beast went into action, disappearing from view, darkness took over...

_~A single touch, a perfect score~  
~A burning church with open doors~  
~A single touch, a perfect score~  
~A burning church with open doors~

* * *

_

_Midnight's Crashing  
Your Favorite Enemies_

_Ozone  
Vistlip_


	5. anywhere beneath the ozone

_**Fire:**__ Sorry for the delay, been working on a couple other projects._

_

* * *

_**if I was to die in the morning…**

_Love is a promise whispering goodbye. Holding onto each other, we made one last wish before Wonderland shattered…  
and when we died that morning… I was still sleeping with you…

* * *

_

_Wake up…_

Was it all a memory or a dream? Slowly, her five senses returned as her mind was rushed with memories, or were they dreams? When she finally opened her eyes again she found herself on the Steppe, everyone was still crystallized beside her, except for two people, two missing people.

"Fang… Lightning…" she whispered, feeling the leather of Hope's gloves grab onto her hand.

_~The avenger is roaming through the land~  
~Ready for the clash, for the lasting gash~  
~Mothers kissing sons with a staff in hands~  
~the bride is shining when the groom is gold~_

All of this started in the Hanging Edge, if she just didn't run or hide, none of this would have happened. While she didn't see what had happened, she knew what had happened with the sight of the crystallized Cocoon before her. Fang and Lightning, through Ragnarok, saved Cocoon and completed their Focus.

"Hey…" Hope started, placing his hand on her shoulder; he had to reach up slightly because of the height difference. "They wanted this." He said. Vanille bowed her head and opened her clenched hand; she didn't know how it got there but Fang's familiar crystal was on the palm of her hand. Just like how Serah's crystal had formed in Snow's hand when she crystallized.

"For you, with you, anything to keep you with me because you're mine." Vanille heard Sazh breathe out beside her as he scratched his head, the little Chocobo fluttering down to rest on Vanille's extended fingers. "Things like that make me wonder how long they've been hiding their relationship from us."

"Not long." Hope deadpanned, his hand dropping off Vanile's shoulder. "Oerba. I saw them in Oerba."

"No, I think it started that night on the Steppes, when they didn't return." The recently awakened Snow threw in as he stretched out his body. "Even then… what am I going to tell Serah?" he motioned towards the crystal pillar that kept Cocoon aloft. No one said anything as Vanille bent her knees, so she was squatting on the ground, her arms draped over her knees. Hope kneeled down beside her, and unlike the night on Oerba, he was the one to draw her into a hug.

_~The Spirit is over town, waiting for me to hit the floor~  
~blooming white sky for the voice of one calling tonight~_

"Take care of Serah… she's mine now." Snow voiced the last words Lightning had spoken to him. "She's going to be heartbroken." He looked up at the crystallized Cocoon. "So close, but yet… so far." He squinted as he looked off in the distance, eyes going wide in realization, he whispered before shouting.

"_Serah!"_ he cried out before running forward at a familiar figure in the horizon. Sazh had shouted his son's name and also broke out into a run to meet his son halfway. A grin broke Vanille's face when she watched Snow lift Serah effortlessly into the air into a spin as the younger Farron laughed, her voice was just as beautiful but yet, so different than the older sister's laugh.

"They're… they're not coming back…" she heard Hope mutter. They had already broken their earlier hug, so she simply wrapped her arms around the torso of the shorter boy.

_~tonight, fate is the red crown, the red crown around your door~  
~Time is scattering the seeds of the mourning daylight~_

Serah broke away from her fiancée and gave Vanille a welcoming smile. However the warm expression quickly disappeared as fast as it came. It was almost unconscious movement. Vanille moved away from Hope as Serah's fisted hand went to her chest, her empty hand grabbing onto Vanille's hand.

"Where's Claire?"

"Claire?" Snow voiced his confusion. Hope made a sound that told everyone that he had just realized something

"_Claire's gone Hope; she's just an old memory." Lightning answered before pressing forward, Fang quickly placed her hand on the soldier's shoulder before spinning her around to face her. Before either party could respond, Fang pressed her lips against Lightning's and the soldier returned the kiss._

"Claire… she can't just be someone Light knew…" he started to pace in a circle. "Claire… Claire's Lightning, am I right?" The look Serah gave him broke his heart instantly as he raised a gloved hand to point at the crystallized Cocoon. "She… she…"

"Both Lightning and Fang bit the bullet to save us all." Sazh commented, rather solemnly as he scratched the back of his head, Dajh holding tightly onto his other hand. "You win some, you lose some."

"No…" Serah sounded; the group caught a glimpse of what the younger Farron was holding onto in her hand. It was Lightning's crystal.

"All we can do is wait, and hope… maybe… one day… they'll wake up." Sazh continued. "They knew what they were getting into… they didn't want to be apart, so they did it together."

_~Shouting worship choked in a wave of silver~  
~The offering's grief for Deceiver's pride,~_

"It'd be great if we could smile tomorrow too." Hope muttered as he bit his lower lip. Serah quickly turned to him.

"Where did you hear that?" the expression on her face was pained, instantly Hope knew he had said something he shouldn't have.

"Back when we were… after…" His thoughts and words where a mess. "She hummed it to Fang, before… before Fang kissed her."

Snow thought Serah would act surprised, but the younger Farron just brushed the news off. As she turned to Vanille with a soft smile, still unaware that she was holding onto her hand.

"I guess, Fang was your friend…"

"She is…" Vanille answered, "I don't think they'll be gone forever. They'll come back." She held out Fang's crystal so it could capture the sunlight. A frown graced Serah's lips and she held out Lightning's crystal. Snow searched his pockets, and to his surprise, he found a familiar teardrop crystal. He smiled to himself, these crystals was the refusal to say goodbye. After all, love _is_ a promise whispering goodbye.

_~Salvation man is a cup of fire~  
~But hope is the star on a morning tide~_

"It's heart-breaking, painful. We don't know when we're going to die… so willful Spica."

Serah tried to repeat some of the lyrics to her sister's favourite song. Struggling to remember she closed her eyes as she released Vanille's hand to bring both of hers to her chest. Snow walked over and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him.

"_To the stars send not 'wishes' but rather 'promises' ..."_ She started again; the tune was lost as she started to cry. Vanille felt her own tears as Hope could only give the Pulsian a solemn smile.

_Listen to my monologue._

"From now on, no matter how many years, let's always be together"

_All I want to say…_

_Swear Forever…_

_Repeat… Forever…_

"Forever…" Serah repeated her voice choked and weak. "I'll never forget you."

_~the Pilgrims are gathering and the marching band, the marching band's howling~  
~Compassion is the flag of righteous man, a righteous man will hold~_

_When asked, 'What kind of relationship do you have?' I say 'Maybe a little more than just friends.' But that's not quite right either... the word 'bond' is more appropriate._

_While falling out with each other, while understanding each other…_

_Our promised meeting place, 'It's the same as always, right?' Under cover of a cloudy sky, if there aren't any stars, let's just become stars._

_While making fun of each other, while loving one another…_

'_Say, where are you?' "Somewhere on Earth." Since we're no astronauts, so if it's anywhere beneath the ozone it's no problem._

'_Okay, I'm on my way.' You must want to cause a racket until morning in our special haven._

_~The Spirit is over town, waiting for me to hit the floor~  
~blooming white sky for the voice of one calling tonight~_

How long has it been? Trust time to scatter everything. Was there still something waiting for them or was there nothing left?

She had opened her eyes to find herself on a grassy plain of the Archylte Steppe; she felt well rested, but yet her body was still pained like she had just dropped fifty feet out of the sky. The crystallized Cocoon stood above both of them, her partner was still asleep; she slowly sat up, her gloved hand going to her back where the buckles to her holsters had been digging into her skin for Etro knows how long.

Standing up slowly on unstable legs, she managed to regain her balance rather swiftly, looking up at her old home. Her hand traveled to the necklace still clasped around her neck. Would there be anyone at home?

"Sunshine." She heard her partner's accented voice whisper in her ear. She closed her eyes as powerful arms were wrapped around her waist and pulled her back to lean her against the slightly taller woman. With a small smile, she turned around in Fang's arms and had her lips captured instantly.

"Good morning." Lightning whispered back when they broke apart. The lancer grinned.

"So we gotta bring down the gods to have Soldier Girl loosen up." She joked; Lightning hummed the general tune to her rather notorious song, Fang exhaled slowly by Light's ear.

"What, no lyric?"

"Nothing fits." Lightning responded, breaking away from Fang's embrace, moving her arm so her hand grabbed onto her partner's. "Although…" she started to lead Fang away from where they stood, up a small hill where they could finally see the base of the crystal pillar. Surrounding it was a small bustling village, up in the sky they could see various vehicles travel to and from Cocoon and to other directions around Gran Pulse.

"_As a low hill floats in the Milky Way, the landscape I look out over is different from what I'd imagined. Have we…_ had they…"Lightning had noticed something at the crest of the hill, her lyrical voice cracking as she moved towards the shadow. Fang tilted her head to the side to try and see what the Farron had found. "Moved forward… since those times?"

Fang decided to walk forward, folding her arms across her chest. Her Bladed Lance dragging across the tips of the tall grass; it was something she would never understand, to wake up from Crystal Sleep and have her primary weapon waiting beside her. She didn't know how it worked, but it just did.

Lightning stood at the top of the hill, her arms hanging by her sides. Driven into the ground like a memorial were an Omega Weapon and a Kain's Lance, their weapons. She watched as Lightning's hand brushed the handle of the gunblade, not daring to pull it from the ground. There had to be several years of rust on the metal; but it still wasn't enough to give them a clue on how much time had passed.

"The answer isn't no, but it's not enough." Lightning whispered, Fang couldn't see it, but she knew there was a smirk on her lips.

"So you think they've forgotten us?" Fang asked when Light took two steps back. The soldier turned to her and flashed a soft smile. For the first time, Fang could easily admit, Lightning was truly at ease. Every time they had managed to get a moment like this before there was always a sliver of tension in the Farron's muscles, it wasn't here now.

Everything felt so different now, there wasn't that sense of urgency anymore, and with their time together in crystal they had learned everything about each other. Fang could easily tell the slight differences between Lightning and Claire, something she knew Serah would never be able to do. When they had first woken, Claire had greeted her and now Lightning stood before her. She watched as a breeze picked up, tossing the loose material of their clothing.

"If it's anywhere beneath the ozone, eh?" Fang voiced after the extended moment of silence, closing the space between them, wrapping her arm around Lightning's waist. "It's not a problem, right?"

"It never was." Lightning responded as she pulled Fang down with her.

_~tonight, fate is the red crown, the red crown around your door~  
~Time is scattering the seeds of the mourning daylight~_

_**

* * *

If I was to die in the morning…**_

_Love is a promise whispering goodbye. Hand in hand, with that one last wish, Wonderland has become a perfect dream…  
and every morning… I am still sleeping with you…

* * *

_

_A perfect leader._

She wasn't one.

Lightning Farron stood on the front doorstep in hesitation. Fang hung back a couple feet, but the lancer stood in a place where she couldn't easily be seen through the front window. It was still early enough in the day that a random house call wouldn't seem unordinary, but it was late enough that it could be an inconvenience. Lightning wasn't even sure if she was at the right house, yes it was the one she had grown up in, but would Serah still be there?

They had wandered around for a while before they found transportation to take them to Bodum, but Lightning had refused to look at anything that referred to the current date, it was just a bonus Fang never followed the calendar date when she had woken up from her first stasis. The world around her was hardly different than the world she had left, probably because the citizens of Cocoon had to learn how to live without Fal'Cie's aid.

"Yeh know Light, no one will answer if ya don't knock." Fang commented, Lightning froze, when did the woman get directly behind her? "You're hesitating; I've never known either of you to be the type."

Lightning would have hit the warrior if she could, but Fang just dodged the elbow by a hair and pressed the button to the doorbell. The echoing chimes making Light's blood run cold. Now she had wished she had checked the date or maybe the local phonebook. Her mind was racing with every worst case scenario she could come up with, most of which made her wish she had ditched parts of her uniform that lined her up with the military.

"Ease up, it's not like a bloody Cie'th will answer the door." Fang whispered in her ear, resting her chin on Light's shoulder. With a grumble, the Farron pushed her off, Fang just grinned as the doorknob turned. Instantly Lightning was coming up with several ways to explain why she at the wrong door, but none of them would explain the damned Pulsian who had her arms wrapped around her waist!

"Get off!"

"Hello?"

"Now ain't that cute?"

Lightning would have slapped Fang if she could, but she knew that the taller woman would just take it as foreplay for whatever she had stored in the back of her mind. However, what was standing between her and the front foyer was the larger issue than Fang's playful antics. Now she really wished she had checked the date and made sure she hadn't _gone back in time_.

Standing at the door was almost a spitting image of her younger self. No older than seven and without the asymmetrical hairstyle. Fang had already bent down on the ground to be on level with the child as Lightning tried to cover up her expression of surprise. Neither party didn't say anything, aside from Fang's constant grin; Light was trying to find the right words as the younger girl just stared at the soldier in amazement, ignoring Fang as a whole.

A perfect leader would have just chucked up the situation and went with it, Lightning wanted to run.

The sound that came out of her mouth wasn't coherent, and then again, neither was the child's.

"Clary! Who's at the door?" a voice, all too familiar to Lightning called out; footsteps following soon after. Her mind was already at work; 'Clary' was just a nickname for the child before her whose full name was most likely a variation of her real name. Light started to tread backwards but Fang caught her arm.

"Where do ya think you're going?"

"Fang… I can't…" Lightning started, she knew this wasn't like her, or anyone she was. A situation like this wasn't something she could simply handle with a gunblade in hand. Fang had already said goodbye to Vanille when they parted ways over seven years ago, but she never even apologized to Serah.

"Clary you just don't answer the door to… any…body…" Serah had appeared and was quickly taking in the sight before her. While it was a hilarious sight to see, her jaw dropped anyway.

"_Lightning?"_

Serah's hand moved to rest on her daughter's shoulder while Lightning pulled Fang to her feet with an angry jerk of her arm. Clearly this wasn't how anyone wanted the reunion to be, but you could always trust the children to ruin it.

"Serah…" Lightning started, taking everything in, roughly guessing, her younger sister had aged about ten years. The other Farron, or Villiers, Light didn't know, only shook her head as she crossed the three steps it took to hug her sister. From the corner of her eye, she could see that Clary had already taken an interest in Fang.

"You're finally home…" Serah whispered, her voice muffled as she cried. Lightning could only hold her closer.

"We're home."

* * *

Cosmos  
Your Favorite Enemies

Ozone  
Vistlip

* * *

**Fire:**_And I'm done… I think… I don't know… I let my mind wander off on this one…_


End file.
